On staying – A reflection of home and medicine
On Staying - A Reflection of Home and Medicine
By: Abhiram Thati
After our Narrative Medicine session, I found myself thinking about time: what it means, what it takes and what it leaves behind. Was there a moment I would change? Revisit? The answer led me back to one of the most important decisions I have made: choosing to stay in Rockford for medical school. I didn’t realize it at first, but staying here deepened my understanding of what medicine means to me.
Family has always structured my life. I was an hour away from home in high school, in college, and now again in Rockford. Recently, I began to worry that I had limited myself geographically. While others my age built lives far away, accumulating distance as proof of growth, I was still in the same nest, beginning to think my wings were clipped. Many of my medical school classmates commute to campus and live in their childhood homes – a sweet idea, although at times it can feel like the world outside is slowly disappearing. I didn’t think I would ever feel that tension, but I do.
When I looked back at every essay and conversation I’ve had about medicine, the same theme appeared: home. Not just a house, but a web of connection. My reasons for pursuing medicine grew from experiences with my mom and brother in clinical settings. Still, that explanation always felt incomplete, up until my first few weeks in Rockford came to a close.
I realized the idea that it was strange we often spend more time remembering people than we spend with them. Maybe what makes some moments precious is that they fade. So, what do we call the ones who stay with us, even when life changes? I think we call that home. And importantly, home wasn’t a place at all; rather, it was a decision to stay put.
Staying in Rockford became an ode to that idea. I didn’t want to become just a memory to the people who raised me, and I didn’t want them to become memories to me. Every person who fed me, sheltered me or offered affection shaped the path that brought me here. Serving this community is the closest I can come to honoring that gift. As a future physician, I hope to care for the same people who cared for me, completing the circle of service.
Of course, leaving home is not a betrayal. People contribute to the world in different ways, whether it be through innovation on the West Coast or research on the East Coast. Every path has value. We simply have to choose the one that feels true to who we are.
Over the past few weeks, this realization has given me unexpected joy. From Dr. (Paul) Chastain’s biochemical mnemonics and Dr. (TJ) Webb’s wild clinical stories to the second-year medical students tutoring us on Fridays, it has been an absolute pleasure to find a new home in Rockford. When I’m cooking with friends, complaining about Anki in the Greenhouse, or driving back on Interstate 90, I feel a warmth that is difficult to explain. I feel rich to be surrounded by people who might become my next universe, and to be part of theirs if they’ll have me.
Thank you, Rockford, for helping me rediscover why it has always been about home. I truly believe that the point of my life was to become a medical student here, and only here.
Abhiram Thati… just a guy who believes medicine is the best form of love.
Abhiram is an M1 at UICOMR
athat3@uic.edu